Mama's Cup of Ambition

Momversation with Sarah St. Clair

• Rachel Mae | Sarah St. Clair • Season 2 • Episode 69

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Allow me introduce you to an extraordinary woman, Sarah St Clair! A homeschooling mom of six, dance teacher,  business owner, and fellow podcaster, Sarah is the embodiment of  ambition, and the ability to juggle multiple roles. 

We delve deep into her dreams of becoming a master Cecchetti teacher and the ups and downs of balancing a myriad of responsibilities. We get real about the pressure modern mothers face and discuss how Sarah manages to maintain equilibrium in her multifaceted life.

This conversation is a testament to the joy and transformative journey of parenting. Join us for this earnest conversation about life, motherhood, dreams, and the importance of savoring every precious moment with our children.

Connect With Today's Guest:
Sarah's Podcast
Find Sarah on Instagram

Next Week on Mama's Cup of Ambition...
Ever been trapped in the comforting arms of a corporate job,  dreaming about unleashing your full potential? Well next week tune in to meet Megan Tobler, founder of the Self Start Her podcast and a corporate escapee. She'll share her inspiring journey from the secure confines of the corporate world to the realm of entrepreneurship, and how she's transforming her ambitions into actions.

Have you been dreaming of starting a podcast but have no idea where to start?  Ditch your podcasting paralysis with my FREE podcast checklist for aspiring mama podcasters.  





Let's Connect On Instagram:
connect with the Show (@mamascupofambition)
connect with Rachel Mae (@rachelmaemusic)

May your dreams be ambitious and may your coffee be strong! xoxo -Rachel Mae

Rachel Mae:

Hello, hello and welcome to Mamas Cup of Ambition, the show for ambitious mamas with big dreams and little kids. I'm your host, Rachel Mae, country Singer, songwriter and Mamas of Two, and I'm so excited to be here presenting another installment of the Momv ersations series. I created this series as a way to have fun and honest conversations with mamas at every stage of their dream chasing journey, and, through a series of questions curated specifically for these Momv ersations, we'll get acquainted with the mamas in this community. We'll chat about everything from their biggest ambitions to their favorite TV shows and everything in between. My intention is to create a space for inspiration, connection and solidarity for us mamas navigating the wild world of motherhood and dream chasing. Wherever you are in your journey, this series is for you. So grab yourself a cup of coffee or your favorite beverage of choice and let's have a Momv ersation.

Sarah St. Clair:

I'm Sarah St. Clair I live in Greenville, south Carolina, with my beautiful family. I have six daughters. The oldest is 19 and graduating high school and the youngest is six and entering first grade next year, and I homeschool all of them. And then me and my husband will be celebrating 20 years of marriage in like two days. So I keep busy with the homeschooling but also I teach dance part time at a dance studio in town and started a business selling secondhand dancewear last August.

Sarah St. Clair:

And then I launched a podcast of a completely different direction, just wanting to encourage moms that they're not alone in all the struggles that they face in life, especially the really hard tragedies and things that you just can't prepare yourself for. And I had so many friends that I would watch from a distance and just wonder, like how did they make it through that? Like I think I would die if I had to face that, and yet they handled it with such strength and grace. And so I want to like honor those stories and bring those stories to light because I think they're worth telling. So that podcast is called Sisters in the Spirit.

Rachel Mae:

So you say really busy homes just like hats off to the homeschooling mamas. That just blows my mind, the concept of homeschooling and teaching dance and doing like all the things that you're doing. You just have so much on your plate. So you are right there, in good company with the core audience of this podcast.

Sarah St. Clair:

We're in the trenches just trying to do it.

Rachel Mae:

Exactly so okay, well, let's jump right into our conversation question.

Sarah St. Clair:

So I dream of Well, I dream of getting my master of ballet teaching with Cecchetti It's a specialized ballet form, and so I dream of like walking across a platform and they say you know, congratulations, sarah St Clair, you're a master teacher. That would just be like, okay, very bad, incredible.

Rachel Mae:

So good, so good. So, is this something that you've, like, already started pursuing, or is this like something on the horizon?

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes.

Rachel Mae:

Someday I'm gonna do that.

Sarah St. Clair:

So I just took my grade two Chiketti exam yesterday Amazing and passed. I think they said you know, thank you for coming, you did a lovely job, so I think I passed. So yeah, last year I studied grade one and then this year grade two, so I started the ball rolling.

Rachel Mae:

So you know you're gonna have to share with us when you have that video of you walking across and then announcing it.

Sarah St. Clair:

I'm gonna see that Sure Please.

Rachel Mae:

Yes, I am like visualizing it for you right now, and I know that's gonna happen, so when it does, please share the video. So, yeah, that'll be an awesome day. Yes, it's coming. Okay, so next question A moment I felt proud of myself was I mean the day that I opened twice upon a tutu.

Sarah St. Clair:

I just was like so proud.

Rachel Mae:

Yeah, this is the name of your business?

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes, my little second hand dancewear business, and I bought like this fancy blouse at a boutique which I never pay like more than thrift store prices for anything, and I spent like over $50 on this blouse, but I had these poofy pink sleeves. It looked like a tutu, you know like yeah for a blouse. And so I wore that blouse on the day that we had our grand opening and, yeah, I was just like, oh my gosh, I did this Instead of being stuck on the couch just dreaming about this really cute name and telling people someday I'm going to start this business, yeah, the name is adorable, by the way.

Rachel Mae:

I love that name. So good.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes, I once I came up with the name. I'm like man junk. Now I can't like not have this business.

Rachel Mae:

Yes, I'm so glad. Sometimes that's all it takes, right? It's just that little spark of inspiration. It's all you need sometimes to just like fan the flames. So yes, so great. Well, that's definitely something to be proud of. Okay, so what's your biggest challenge right now?

Sarah St. Clair:

Oh, I think probably all us moms just like struggle with the division of like work and then like our main calling in life to raise kids and keep them alive. But I think we have like way more expectations of more than just keeping them alive, like we think we need to have, you know, the our house clean all the time and the kids like one one mom, I mean probably at least over half our audience. We'd have to pull them, but they probably bathe their children every night. And I was talking to some mom and she's like, yeah, it's exhausting. Like she's over 20 weeks pregnant and she has two little ones.

Sarah St. Clair:

She's like I've just been having to bathe them every night. It's exhausting. I'm like, can I tell you a secret? I only bathe my children twice a week. They get bathed on Wednesday and Saturday and I call it good. And the horrified look on her face. I was just like, oh, maybe I shouldn't have mentioned that, but I just feel like we have these expectations that we have to do everything absolutely perfectly and the best, and so letting go of perfection and and then just that balancing act of like not feeling guilty when I'm working my job and then not feeling guilty when I'm spending time with my kids and saying no to my job for the evening or the weekend or whatever.

Rachel Mae:

Yeah, it's like I'm probably going to butcher this because I'm horrible with like regurgitating quotes on the spot, but it's that that idea that like we want moms to mother like they don't have a job and work like they don't have children. Yes, that effect right and it's just an impossible standard to achieve.

Rachel Mae:

Right you can't do both of those things and we shouldn't have to. Yeah, there's a time and a place for each of those things to coexist and really like the time, I'm a strong believer that the time that we pour into the things that fill our cup in a creative way or just in something that is seemingly unrelated to motherhood, I think it's all connected.

Rachel Mae:

But I think like those parts where we're getting to do something that just gets our brains going into flow state that makes us more present and more available, parents, when we are parenting our children, because we aren't pouring from this empty cup of just always doing for others and yes it's a real hard shift to wrap our minds around like me filling my own cup and taking care of my own needs. And taking care of myself is taking care of my children as well.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yeah, because it does make us better moms. Like I'm a much more happier mom since I started working part time outside the home and going to the dance studio and teaching. I started with only two hours a week because I didn't think I could handle any more than that, but now I do it like three afternoons a week for four to five hours each day and, yeah, it makes me happier. I come home and I'm like, ok, like I just did that and now I can refocus and feel refreshed.

Rachel Mae:

I think that's great. I think you're really saying something here, too, about like you didn't go all in right out the gate. You let yourself sort of like dip a toe in and see how it felt and build a little bit of runway, and I think that is such an incredible thing that I want mamas who are listening to this to hear too, that like sometimes you can just give yourself permission to like test it yes.

Rachel Mae:

And if you try it and you're like, oh, actually I don't like this back out, you don't have to do it. But if you do, you also have permission to say I really enjoy this and I'm going to do more of it. But I think that's really powerful. What you just said there about starting out with just two hours, Uh huh.

Sarah St. Clair:

I had a journal because I journal a lot. I tried a journal a couple of times a week and when I started getting ready to launch the twice upon a to to business and stuff, it just said big things start with small beginnings. And I just was like yes, because everything I've done. Like you picture what you want it to be in the long run. But you have to start somewhere. And if you think about starting big, I think you stay stopped because it's too much. It's like looking at a burger. You can't eat the whole delicious hamburger all in one bite. Like you got to take a bite at a time.

Rachel Mae:

So true, so good. Oh, my gosh Okay.

Sarah St. Clair:

So my perfect day would be oh, my perfect day would probably be up in the mountains by a waterfall in a hammock. Yes, sounds delightful Just watching the clouds roll by and probably somebody bringing a Frappuccino sometime in there.

Rachel Mae:

Yes, you had me at hammock, so good.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes.

Rachel Mae:

And the delivery of the Frappuccino too. That just puts it over the top. Yeah, okay.

Sarah St. Clair:

My power song is oh man, that is a great question. I do worship singing a lot at church and so, champion is one that we sing a lot, you are my champion, and just the thought of someone bigger than me, you know, fighting for me is like so empowering Cause I'm like, even when I feel like there's nothing more in me, knowing that I can trust that God's got my back is huge.

Rachel Mae:

Amazing. So, champion, I need to just make a Spotify playlist or something with all of the songs that I'm getting here, because everybody has such incredible songs, like we could just make the most empowering playlist.

Sarah St. Clair:

At the beginning of the year I kind of pick a theme for the year and then start a playlist based on that theme. That's a great idea. So when I hear a song that I'm like, oh, you know that fits, I'll just like dump it onto there. So last year my playlist was Joy Comes in the Morning, because it was a really hard year. And then this year is Hope.

Rachel Mae:

I love that. I love the idea of pairing a playlist with your like intention for the year. I've heard of a lot of people and I do that too. I set an intention for the year, but I've never heard of somebody making a playlist to go alongside that. That is such a great idea.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yeah, I just started that recently, like it just hit me because so many songs. I'm like, oh, I need that right now. And so I'm like, how do I keep track of all these songs? I don't want to forget it, you know. And so then when you're in that low moment and you need the reminders, then I could just turn to that playlist and know I was going to hear what I needed to hear.

Rachel Mae:

Such a great idea. I love that so much so to go along with that. Do you have a mantra or a motto?

Sarah St. Clair:

Oh goodness, Winnie the Pooh's like my spirit animal.

Rachel Mae:

Okay, that might be the best quote of this whole thing. I love that so much.

Sarah St. Clair:

So I think, like his whole, I need a thinking spot and a snack. Girl like you know, bring me some honey. Yeah, I know that's not a very profound quote at all, but I'm just like, give me a thinking spot and a snack and I probably could be good to go.

Rachel Mae:

I wouldn't underestimate a thinking spot and a snack. Actually, I think who might have been into something there, especially in motherhood right? Like if you can have a spot where you can just tuck away and actually think without distraction, like there is actually something to be said.

Sarah St. Clair:

It's a big thing to be said. Yes, for sure, it's needed.

Rachel Mae:

I feel like these days too, like we have so much going on in our phones and social media and all of this always kind of just running in the background, it is really hard these days to sort of just stop and let your mind wander and think and have all of that spaciousness that is so good for the soul.

Sarah St. Clair:

So yeah, I don't know, and sometimes I think we're almost afraid of the quiet nowadays because we're so used to all the noise. Yeah, so I try sometimes, as much as I love music and love singing and stuff, sometimes I try to leave my headphones behind and even my phone behind and take the dog on a walk without Anything and just listen to the birds and the breeze and just let my mind rest for a minute.

Rachel Mae:

Yeah, that's so good. I have to do that. I tend to listen to podcasts constantly, like I always have a podcast doing the dishes or something, and I have a podcast playing, which is incredible and I love that.

Rachel Mae:

Yeah, but I've had to kind of pull back a little bit sometimes, like you're saying, and it's like why, when you're in the shower, you feel like you have all of these ideas pop into your mind and it's because you're not on your phone. You're letting yourself just be present. Yes, you're in the water and you're doing something connected to your body and to yourself and you're not distracted by yeah, I mean, maybe you've got something playing in the background, but it does make a lot of sense to you, like what you're talking about. If you go out for a walk, that you're probably going to feel so much more restored if you do just let yourself have that presence.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes, so good, because I think we don't realize that we can get like information overload and then it's like it all just jumbles up in there. You have to have a time to kind of download the files and close out the windows a little bit.

Rachel Mae:

Yeah, I'm such a fan of ambition like I'm all about big dreams and going after things, but I do think there is a fine line there, too, of starting to feel like, oh, I'm behind or I'm never going to catch up to all of these things, where you almost feel like that information overload.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes.

Rachel Mae:

Yes, and then all of a sudden you're like, oh my gosh, what I'm doing isn't enough, I'm not enough, I'm like behind. I got to go faster and do more and be more. And it's really like what you. This comes back to what you were saying before big things starting small. Like we can start small and take baby steps and I just heard Stu McClaren saying this that, like, slow progress is still progress. Yes, we can take baby steps and still get to where we want to go, but if you're always listening to something telling you, giving you all of that information, you can really easily get caught.

Sarah St. Clair:

Another list, yeah, another list of to do. Yeah, yeah, you can get so exhausted by it, yeah, yeah. My business coach. One of her main sayings is keep it simple. And she's like I give you permission to keep it simple, because your people are out there waiting for what you have to offer and yet you're so busy making everything so complicated that you can't get to waiting.

Rachel Mae:

Yes, yeah, yeah, that's great, keep it simple. Keep it simple and put it out there. Yeah, yeah, okay. So my go to indulgence is a bubble bath. Okay, is this like like candles or?

Sarah St. Clair:

like I mean, I used to. I used to have time to do all that. Now, as long as I make it into the water well, it's still hot I'm lucky and count, count it as a blessing. And yeah, sometimes I'll sip either wine or my plexus pink drink is very refreshing. So if I haven't had it yet that day I'll do it. But like last night when I came home from taking my chiketti exam, I was like I love you all but mom's headed to her reward. I'm going to take a bubble bath.

Rachel Mae:

Oh my gosh, I love it Okay, so my guilty pleasure TV show is oh.

Sarah St. Clair:

Well, lately it's been a YouTube channel instead of a TV show, because with seven other people that have their favorite things to watch, it's very hard for me to actually turn on the TV for myself. But on my phone I love hopping on YouTube and I watched this gal named Caroline Winkler and she started her YouTube channel as a home decorator. So I ran across a home decorated thing because that's just one of my extra hobby things, but then she's turned it into like a vlog and a personal like. She's taken psychology, I think. So she likes to break down just life things, and so I you never know what you're going to get like if it's going to be a remodel of a bathroom, or if she's going to talk about her latest breakup and what she feels she learned from it or whatever. And she's hilarious. She has a really dry sense of humor.

Rachel Mae:

So Okay, I'm going to have to look this up.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes, I can send you the link.

Rachel Mae:

Awesome, okay, so I wish someone had told me this about becoming a mama.

Sarah St. Clair:

Oh, wow, what a good question. It's kind of sad, but I wish somebody had warned me that even watching your healthy kids grow up is like there is something sad about it, and nobody warned me about that. Like mix of emotion at every birthday that you're like so happy they're turning to you, but then you're like but I'm letting go of all the first things. Like now they're a toddler and we won't be doing the baby things anymore. Or you know, like you get tired of nursing. But then you're like now it's over and I'm not nursing anymore. Like it's just an interesting conundrum of letting go and you're going to make me cry, you're so right though.

Sarah St. Clair:

So now my baby's 19 and graduating, and she has a boyfriend. Today she's like mom. It's our one year anniversary and you know they're madly in love and it's exciting, but at the same time there's like that little part of my heart that's like oh, oh, my gosh.

Rachel Mae:

Yeah, I find myself saying that to my kiddos all the time. Like I just look at them sometimes, especially like while they're sleeping, not in a creepy way, but just like I look at them sleeping and I'm just like yeah slow down, I mean keep going, but slow down Like it's it goes so fast. I always thought that was just something that parents said.

Rachel Mae:

Yes, like, oh, it goes so fast and then once you have kids, you're like, oh my god, everybody was right, it does go so fast, and I don't know that there is any way to really prepare you for that, I guess.

Sarah St. Clair:

But no, and I think in light of that, just taking time to savor the moments and you know, I used to just be trying so hard to prove that I was a good mom or the perfect mom that I, you know, I was kind of tightly wound with those first babies and now, like with the younger ones, like there's a reason why people say that the babies of family are spoiled. But I think it's just because you learn to let go a little more and that you realize like it's OK to spoil them, it's OK to let them snuggle in bed with you for a little bit longer, or whatever it is so yeah, right, because we're growing too as parents.

Rachel Mae:

Like we don't just have our first baby and then come with, like the manual that tells us how to do everything, like we have to grow and learn everything as they grow and, yeah, there's an evolution that has to happen for us too, because we're growing and learning too.

Sarah St. Clair:

So yeah, so it's OK to mess up and you won't ruin them.

Rachel Mae:

So good, ok, so my go-to influencer. This could be a blog or a podcast, or YouTuber.

Sarah St. Clair:

Rita Springer has been probably the most influential one this year. Back in August she came to our church to our women's conference and spoke, and I had never heard of her before, like I knew her songs but I didn't realize that they were written by her. But, she had started a podcast, like literally just a couple months before, and so I looked up her music and then found her podcast and so, like every Friday, I'm like, yay, the Rita Springer podcast, I get to clean something and listen to it and I just love it.

Rachel Mae:

This is why I'm, like, such a fan of podcasts, because it's like when you feel this bond or connection with somebody before they have the podcast and then they put a podcast in the mix, it's like you just get to go deeper and make that connection even stronger. I just podcast feel like such a magical medium for me. I love that so good. What's your favorite product or resource that has made mom life easier?

Sarah St. Clair:

I mean, I guess like I just I couldn't live without my plexus Because I used to struggle a lot with depression and anxiety and I feel like, since taking the plexus pink drink and their bio-cleans and I take one of their other vitamins, like I used to just be on the couch all the time and like feel so tired and so overwhelmed just by what I had to do at the house and I went through a season of driving anxiety really bad. So just like getting my hormones balanced and stuff, my energy is back and now, like my friends that walked through that season with me like they still can't believe, but I really feel like it does make a huge difference. So yeah, yeah, incredible. I was like thinking through all the baby things and stuff and then I'm like, wait a minute, like this is what really has changed my, the direction of my life. I feel like so.

Rachel Mae:

And it's like what we were talking about before. It all connects right, Like if you're not well and you aren't functioning at your best capacity, it's hard to serve anyone else in your family.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes.

Rachel Mae:

It's all connected and intertwined, so that totally makes sense to me as a resource that has changed the game, and mom like yeah yeah, okay. So I'm obsessed with.

Sarah St. Clair:

I'm obsessed with paisley, oh Okay. So I find paisley clothes and paisley pillowcases and anything that has paisley on it. And now my whole family knows and they're like mom paisley.

Rachel Mae:

Paisley and Winnie the Pooh. So, yes. It feels like it could be like a kids brand or something paisley and poo Right.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yeah, I want to like design a logo that says it's a paisley life. Instead of a crazy life, it's a paisley life, and then just have, like all these, you know, a mug and a t-shirt, and I just think it would be fun.

Rachel Mae:

Yeah, so cool. Okay, my dream vacation is.

Sarah St. Clair:

I mean, the one we've been dreaming of recently is going to New York City. We'd love to take a train to New York City and then watch a bunch of Broadway shows. My husband is a theater director so he's all into Broadway and I love going with him. We always try to watch some Broadway show for our anniversary every year. And then, of course, I'd want to go to the ballet while we were there. Go see New York City Ballet or ABT or something. So so great, that would be really fun.

Rachel Mae:

I love that you incorporated the train ride too.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes, we both have talked about like we've flown. Before I've taken a train ride like in my teens Me and my brother took a train from Chicago to Kansas City and it was just super fun. So me and my husband are like that would be so cool. You always see it in movies and it just looks so like romantic. I don't know.

Rachel Mae:

So cool. Okay, so fill in the blank.

Sarah St. Clair:

I feel most like myself when I'm I mean probably when I'm teaching dance, Okay, and just around students and like investing in them, it's really my happy place.

Rachel Mae:

Awesome. Well, I'm so glad that you are doing that, that you made the time and got yourself to start doing that.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yes, and it's really been neat to see, because at first I thought I was doing it for myself, but then they offered to let my kids take classes as well, and so now all of my girls have just fallen in love with dance and they get joy out of it, and so, yeah, it's ended up blessing them in a way that I didn't even realize. I mean, it also gives mom a little extra spending money, so when they ask for the treat here and there, I can say yes, yeah.

Rachel Mae:

Okay, so my current ambitious goal is Well.

Sarah St. Clair:

I'm going to start studying Chiketti grade three very soon and after taking the last exam and feeling super tired before the end of it, yeah, I'm like I need to condition. So I'm going to start blocking out 20 minutes a day. I use an app called fit on I think that's what it's called but it has like really good 20 minute exercises and when I've been consistent with it I can tell a difference. So a little extra fluff goes away and I feel more energized for the day. But it's only 20 minutes, which I feel is like so much more doable than a 45 minute workout or having to go to the gym. So I just have to make that happen.

Rachel Mae:

That's great, and that is in line with what we talked about in the beginning too. With your dream, they go hand in hand, so that's good, yes, okay.

Sarah St. Clair:

So I'm known for. My friends just tell me that I'm happy all the time. It's amazing. So that's what.

Rachel Mae:

I'm known for Okay, so what's something that most folks don't know about you?

Sarah St. Clair:

Probably the fact that I struggle with anxiety and stuff Like people. Just when they find that out about me, they're just like no way, because you are happy all the time. We wouldn't know that inside it's a crazy mess in there.

Rachel Mae:

Yeah, we all have that contrast within us. Yeah.

Sarah St. Clair:

So, like sometimes my heart will be beating out of my chest or I'll be really frustrated or confused, but I've learned how to you know, just like, take a deep breath and try to remain calm and tell myself like it'll be okay.

Rachel Mae:

Yeah, okay, fill in the blank. I do blank.

Sarah St. Clair:

So my kids I dream big, and so my kids dream big.

Rachel Mae:

Yes.

Sarah St. Clair:

Like I was taking notes before this, just to kind of formulate some thoughts and just realizing like I didn't want to wait until my kids were grown up. That's like the generation before us I feel, like they just were like they at home with your kids. They grow up fast, so then, once they're gone, then you can pursue your dream. And I just that did not settle well with my spirit at all. I'm like why do I have to wait to live my dream before they grow up? And so I wanted them to be part of seeing me reach my dreams. And since I've been pursuing them now like they all have their own dreams, you know, one wants to be a baker and have a bakery. One wants to have a dress shop and design dresses, and we just talk about it all the time. And you know, do you think I could do this, mom? Yes, yes, you can totally do that.

Rachel Mae:

Right, and they're seeing proof of it. Because you're doing it, you're letting them see what's possible by modeling and going first, and what an incredible gift to give your girls like, obviously I'm here for it. I think that's amazing and yeah, and that's why.

Sarah St. Clair:

I just love your podcast and was just like, yes, this is totally my jam because I have ambition and I didn't want to wait to be ambitious.

Rachel Mae:

And I'm so glad it's like what you were saying, that your coach says like there are people out there who need what you have right now too. So think about that too, of like, if you're waiting and putting it off all those people who you could be impacting and connecting not only impact that you're making with your children, but also the impact that you're making out into the world by showing up authentically and stepping forward in the things that are calling you, I think you are impacting on a bigger scale, not only within your family, but also out in the world. So, yeah, it's powerful.

Sarah St. Clair:

Yeah, it really is. I want the people listening and you know that mom listening that has a dream but just doesn't feel like she could possibly have the strength or

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