Tune in for my momversation with Natalie Wilkinson, the voice behind Rad Mom Radio and a pillar for a community of over 1500 moms. She steps into the spotlight to share her journey of being a mama, a podcaster, and a community leader. Join us as we navigate the beautiful chaos that is motherhood.
Connect With Today's Guest:
Natalie's Podcast
Find Natalie on Instagram
Next Week on Mama's Cup of Ambition...
If you or someone you know is pregnant or hoping to be, next week's episode of Mama's Cup of Ambition is gonna be one to catch because I'll be joined by Taryn Firkser, the founder of Aubergine & Olive.
Taryn helps women to safely and naturally nourish themselves and their babies from preconception, during pregnancy, through postpartum and beyond! Tune in next week to hear our conversation.
Let's Connect On Instagram:
connect with the Show (@mamascupofambition)
connect with Rachel Mae (@rachelmaemusic)
May your dreams be ambitious and may your coffee be strong! xoxo -Rachel Mae
Tune in for my momversation with Natalie Wilkinson, the voice behind Rad Mom Radio and a pillar for a community of over 1500 moms. She steps into the spotlight to share her journey of being a mama, a podcaster, and a community leader. Join us as we navigate the beautiful chaos that is motherhood.
Connect With Today's Guest:
Natalie's Podcast
Find Natalie on Instagram
Next Week on Mama's Cup of Ambition...
If you or someone you know is pregnant or hoping to be, next week's episode of Mama's Cup of Ambition is gonna be one to catch because I'll be joined by Taryn Firkser, the founder of Aubergine & Olive.
Taryn helps women to safely and naturally nourish themselves and their babies from preconception, during pregnancy, through postpartum and beyond! Tune in next week to hear our conversation.
Let's Connect On Instagram:
connect with the Show (@mamascupofambition)
connect with Rachel Mae (@rachelmaemusic)
May your dreams be ambitious and may your coffee be strong! xoxo -Rachel Mae
Hello, hello and welcome to Mamas Cup of Ambition, the show for ambitious mamas with big dreams and little kids. I'm your host, Rachel Mae Country Singer, songwriter and Mamas of 2, and I'm so excited to be here presenting another installment of the momversations series. I created this series as a way to have fun and honest conversations with mamas at every stage of their dream chasing journey, and, through a series of questions curated specifically momversations these , we'll get acquainted with the mamas in this community. We'll chat about everything from their biggest ambitions to their favorite TV shows and everything in between. My intention is to create a space for inspiration, connection and solidarity for us mamas navigating the wild world of motherhood and dream chasing.
Rachel Mae:Wherever you are in your journey, this series is for you. So grab yourself a cup of coffee or your favorite beverage of choice and let's momversation a . This is really exciting. I'm always so happy and humbled when I get to invite fellow podcasters onto my show, because I feel a real sense of camaraderie and connection with podcasters, but especially with the mama podcasters. That fits the bill here. I would love for you to give us a little introduction, let our audience know who you are and a little bit about what you do.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah, so I'm not great at introductions. I'm like that person who's really not good at job interviews or explaining who I am. But my name is Natalie Wilkinson. I live in the Central Valley of California with my husband, josh, and our son Riley. Riley is eight years old. He's super feisty, always keeping me on my toes.
Natalie Wilkinson:Like you said, I'm a podcaster. My podcast is called Rad Mom Radio and it focuses on mostly like topics that moms want to talk about, really talking about the realness of motherhood and the stuff that people don't necessarily always want to hear about but needs to be talked about. I'm also a community leader, so I you know, in my city and in the Central Valley of California I lead a support group for moms of autistic and neurodivergent children. I started that because my son Riley is autistic. I'm actually coming up on five years of that now, so started that five years ago, which is kind of trippy when you think about it, because, you know, I'm the type of person where, like, I don't necessarily think about longevity when I start something. I just started and I kind of just thought there'd be like five moms who would relate to each other and understand each other, and now it's grown to like over 1500 moms. So you know, that's kind of like what I do.
Natalie Wilkinson:Aside from that, I'm a stay at home mom. I had at one point like aspirations of being a marriage and family therapist, but I kind of put that on the back burner when Riley was, you know, when he was starting to show signs of having autism or being autistic. I kind of couldn't like focus on anything else. That really took precedence for me, and so I haven't picked that back up and I'm not really sure that that's what I want to do anymore. So kind of just in this like space of not really knowing what I want to do, you know yeah right now.
Rachel Mae:So well, that's really inspiring.
Rachel Mae:I'm always just like mind blown when I see especially mamas and the capacity that we have to fill the need where we see it and how so often the things that we stumble into in our own motherhood experience and we realize that we need support or community around and we maybe there's something that could fill that need, but it's not just quite what we need how willing mamas are to step up and say, okay, I'll go first, I'll fill this need.
Rachel Mae:And it sounds like that's exactly what you're doing in that role of community leader. And how incredible that, like you're saying, you thought maybe this would be like five mamas and what it's turned out to be is like literally a whole tribe of mamas who are saying, oh, me too, like I need support and community here. And what an incredible thing that you're offering. Because I would imagine that it must feel very isolating to be navigating that territory and so to have that community and that connection, to know that you're not alone and to know that there is support and you don't have to go through that uncharted territory all on your own, I think that's really amazing. So it sounds like you're in alignment with something and you're really being called to do here and maybe something that you didn't know you were going to be thrust into, but that you've stepped into. So amazing.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, it's been cool. Well, let's jump right into our conversation question. So the first one is what are you currently dreaming of?
Natalie Wilkinson:I would say right now something that I think about a lot. I don't know if it's going to sound silly, but like financial independence. So like I think about like the future, you know, like coming up on middle age. Now I think about like the second half of my life, and especially like having a child that has like special needs. You know, there's no way to predict. Is he going to be independent? Is he going to need assistance? So I think about, like what are we going to do to help secure not just secure ourselves financially, but also be able to enjoy life, which always requires money? So I would say, like my husband likes to play the lottery. I'm not that type of person. I think I'm too pragmatic, but I think I dream about like just being very comfortable and not having to worry about money. Yeah, If that makes any sense.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, totally. It's one of those things that I know people always say, like money can't buy happiness, and maybe that's true. But money can buy a sense of freedom and not having to make choices based on, like, well, how much is this going to cost, or having to, like, make all of your decisions based on the cost of something, and that really impacts quality of life. So I totally get that and I feel that on the sole level.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah.
Rachel Mae:Awesome. Well, tell us what's the moment that you felt proud of yourself.
Natalie Wilkinson:I would say a lot of the time when I feel proud of myself is just in the moments that you know I interact with my son.
Natalie Wilkinson:You know something that like comes up a lot on my podcast, is kind of like this generational thing, it seems almost where, like this generation of parents that we're a part of right now are kind of waking up to the fact that we were never taught to emotionally regulate ourselves.
Natalie Wilkinson:And so you know these moments when you're trying to help your child regulate which is our job but when you sit there and you realize I don't know how to teach them how to do something I was never taught how to do. And so these, these moments for me that are really kind of and I don't use the word lightly but like it feels almost miraculous sometimes that that I'm able to sit there with my son and have empathy and patience and compassion for him in those moments when that's the opposite of what I experienced as a child. So I would say, like those are the moments that I keep bringing back to the front of my memory is like you need to be proud of yourself or how, how you talk to him, how you treat him, how you love him, because those moments are so huge.
Natalie Wilkinson:So, I would say that's probably for me, like what I find a lot of pride in.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, that's really powerful and it is something that comes up a lot on this podcast as well, which I think is really incredible, because it is sort of this like uprising of like we're not trying to throw shade at anyone and we can recognize that like all of our parents were doing the best that they could do with the programming that they had. But now that we are rewiring and reprogramming our own minds and beliefs and approaching our parenting styles in a different capacity, it is really inspiring to hear how many mommas are navigating this and also kind of heartbreaking in a way, too, to recognize how many of us are also trying to do that reprogramming on ourselves and to really like figure out in those moments too, what can sometimes be so triggering for us.
Rachel Mae:You know, we haven't had that ability or been taught as children how to regulate our own emotions, like we carry that into our experience of motherhood and how we move through situations with our kids and things that really trigger us, and so I think that is something to be really proud of and something to be really compassionate with ourselves, because we're navigating this like pool of emotions both like our child's emotions and then our emotions and figuring out how to like swim in those waters that are kind of choppy. You're absolutely right, that is totally something to be proud of and I think so often, if we really looked at the day and how many times we as parents take that deep breath and like sit in presence with something that our kid is going through, we would be really proud if we had that zoomed out overview.
Rachel Mae:But we kind of just are in the hustle of like go, go, go. We've got so many things that we're trying to do as mommas that we don't often stop to look back and be like, wow, I actually did a very good job as a parent today to my child, especially with everything that I have on board myself that I'm trying to work through. So I love that and I love that you brought that into the context as the thing that you're proud of, because I think that's something we could all stand to like see in ourselves as well. So I love that you're role-modeling that for us here.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah, it's hard, and those triggers are hard because it's not just triggering, like I believe that our kids trigger us in a lot of different ways. They trigger our sensory system you know, things are too loud or like all that stuff they also trigger, like our inner child, a lot, like when your child is acting in a certain way, it takes you back to your own childhood and if there's anything there that's still wounded, which I think there is for all of us like they're going to activate that. And so it's a lot, when you think about it, to sit in a space and to be experiencing all these things on all these different levels at the same time. Like it's no wonder that we struggle not to react, you know, not to yell, not to, whatever the case may be. So it's a lot, it's a lot of pressure and I think we have to like be nicer to ourselves about all of that.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, I agree, totally agree.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah.
Rachel Mae:So what would you say is your biggest challenge right now?
Natalie Wilkinson:So my biggest challenge kind of relates to the last question about what are you proud of is not beating myself up for the ways that I wish I was a better mom.
Natalie Wilkinson:You know, like there's certain ways that I wish I was better at being a mom that are just so hard for me, Like it's like if you think about seasonal things, like when holidays come up, or like when summertime comes up, and it's like in my mind and in my heart I want to be that mom that does all the things like let's make fresh, like natural watermelon popsicles and you know. Let's like build a pool in the backyard and let's like do all these fun summer things. And then when winter comes, like let's have the cutest house in the neighborhood and let's do you know what I mean Like let's do the cute, like family pictures at the pumpkin patch. But those are the things I struggle with so much, you know, to accomplish, and those are the things I beat myself up a lot about not accomplishing. Doing those things it's not my strong suit and I'm trying to learn to be nicer to myself about that.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, it's an interesting experience of motherhood in this era, right? Because I feel like so much of that is really like we see it around us and we feel like, ooh, that is what it means to be a mom, like I have to do these things and I have to be this version of what we see as like mom, when in reality, what you just said about you are doing this work internally so that you can show up and be a present mom for your child and have your emotions regulated, so you can help your child regulate their emotions. You're winning at it Like that is more valuable and more long lasting and impactful than any like cute decorations or watermelon popsicles you could ever make, but it is.
Rachel Mae:There's like ongoing pressure to be all the things and to do all of that at the same time, like be doing all of this like reprogramming and then also be like creating this, like Pinterest worthy life, and it's like the reality is we're human and like our lives are happening in real time and your capacity or ability to not do those things that's not what defines you as a parent and I think it's human to feel sort of a longing for that. I can definitely think of moments in my own experience of motherhood to feel like, for example, when I was pregnant, I felt like I am the worst, like I didn't take hardly any bump pictures, like I didn't get like professional maternity photos. And then you see mama's doing that and that's great, like I'm so happy that they're doing that because it's aligned and it works for them. But why do I have to turn that internal and make it like something like I'm not enough or I'm not doing enough? The reality was like I felt awful for a big portion of my pregnancies and I just didn't feel like getting my bump pictures taken, like it didn't mean that I didn't, the experience didn't still happen and that I love my experience of pregnancy, but like there was a real sort of internal criticism about that. So I think that's something very specific to our generation of mamas too. I'm sure like every generation has had their version of that.
Rachel Mae:But if you think there's a lot of pressure, especially with social media, you see everything and it's just blasted in your face. Yeah, that's challenging for sure, but I love yourself. Awareness and just recognizing, like, what you have the capacity to do. Not to ramble on here, but I want to say too, like maybe you're not making the watermelon popsicles, but you're literally creating this like incredible support of community for mamas to come together and find support in an experience of motherhood that they're having. And you're podcasting. Like the things you're doing are pretty freaking incredible. So I just want to like reflect that back to you and say that you're doing some pretty phenomenal stuff that is impactful and the ripple effects of that you may never see, but those ripple effects could very well be and I believe are likely life changing to the people that you are reaching.
Natalie Wilkinson:So, yeah, let's celebrate that. Thank you, you made me emotional. I need to hear stuff like that sometimes, so I appreciate that. Yeah, didn't mean to make you cry, but no, it's just sometimes, like, you know, you walk around with your head in the clouds and you're not thinking about stuff and it's like, yeah, to hear someone else's perspective is helpful, because it's like, yeah, I do do that, so like I didn't make the popsicles, but I do that. That's pretty good, you know, it's not bad.
Rachel Mae:That's right. We can't always see it for ourselves, right. We can see what everyone else is doing or the version of whatever what we think everyone else is doing, but it's really hard to see. We're so close to our own experience. It's really hard to see sometimes what you're actually creating in the world. So tell us, what would your perfect?
Natalie Wilkinson:day be. So the first thing that I thought about when I saw that question was like a nap, like the first thing that came to my mind was a nap. I really have been enjoying napping, yeah, but like a specific kind of nap. So have you seen that meme where it's like a person and it almost looks like they're laying in a big white fluffy cloud, but it's like a comforter and it's talking about how they have the air conditioning on and the fan at the same time? That sounds dreamy. Yeah, that's like the perfect nap is like it's cold but you've got a big fluffy blanket. So for me there definitely be like that kind of nap involved. I would say like getting to sleep in, not having to do anything for anybody but myself would be, awesome and honestly, that's like.
Natalie Wilkinson:That sounds pretty good to me, like just not having to do anything for anybody and have to cook anything for anybody. You don't have to like help anybody, do anything. No expectations, nothing, yeah.
Rachel Mae:It's so funny how these, like I imagine, the answer to these questions before having children would be so different, so different as they should be.
Rachel Mae:But like this question and some of these questions always evoke this like there it's such a through line of like mama's wanting to be, like I kind of just want to be left alone for the day, like I love my family, I love my kids with all that I have, but also like I'm tired, I want sleep and I don't want to have to lift a finger for anyone else. I mean it's service of anyone else and even better, like have somebody like bringing the food and stuff to me so that I just like, really just like veg out. Yeah, it's, it's a very shared experience of motherhood. I think so.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah, it's very simple, but it never happens Like. I can't think of the last time I had a whole day or I didn't have to do anything for anybody.
Rachel Mae:No, I don't know that.
Natalie Wilkinson:That's a thing you know.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, okay. Well, do you have a power song, a song that can just sort of like bring your energy up when you really need a boost?
Natalie Wilkinson:That one was a hard one because, like, I overthought it a lot. What is a power song I really like? And I think this has to do with like a sensory thing, but I really like music that I feel like it's almost like the electronic dance music which makes me sound so I don't know. It sounds silly to me because I didn't really know that was a thing. And then I remember when I used to work I was listening to a playlist and they're like oh wow, you really like that EDM stuff, don't you?
Natalie Wilkinson:And I was like, well, I don't even know what that means, but music that's very like gets into your sensory system. Like there's a lot of like bass. So like I really like is it Florence and the Machine. They have some songs that I feel like really get your energy going, like she Wolf is one, and then there's a couple others, but I don't know that I have like a specific one that's like a go to yeah, it's hard to pick, just one Sometimes you need, like it's a series of songs or just sort of like an energy or a vibe of music that can sort of bring you out.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah.
Rachel Mae:I think music is such a powerful. Obviously I'm biased as a musician, but I think music is such a powerful tool when we're feeling like overwhelmed or overloaded, Like it can really serve as sort of a reset button if you've got the right song or playlist to just sort of shake things up. I think it's. It's pretty incredible.
Natalie Wilkinson:Well, I actually have one of your songs on one of my playlists now because because I liked it on Spotify and so I was listening to my like songs the other day and then I get this like country twang in my ear and I was like what? Oh yeah, that's Rachel, awesome. I forgot what it's like. It's like why you don't call, or you don't call. Wonder why you don't call, oh man.
Rachel Mae:Oh yeah, it's cute. I don't really listen to a lot of.
Natalie Wilkinson:I don't really listen to a lot of country, but I like. I like your voice. Thank you, that's enjoy your voice.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, oh, my gosh, I love that I'm your. Like one twangy song on your playlist.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah, you're my one country song on my playlist yeah, awesome, well, okay.
Rachel Mae:So this one kind of goes hand in hand with the power song. But do you have a mantra or a motto, something that you say to kind of ground yourself?
Natalie Wilkinson:I would say like one of my most core beliefs in life, or philosophies, is that as human beings, we are here on earth to take care of each other, and I very much like remind myself about that all the time. It doesn't matter, like if you like someone, if you relate to them, if you see someone struggling or in need, like we are here to take care of each other and I ultimately believe that every human deserves respect, love, kindness and just. That's always at the forefront of my mind. It's like one of my most guiding, I guess, principles in life.
Rachel Mae:It's powerful. That's definitely apparent in the work that you're doing and in you know what you're creating and cultivating within your life. It's obvious that that's like one of your core values. So I like that that's powerful, yeah. So what's your go to indulgence Television?
Natalie Wilkinson:TV, reality TV, especially nowadays. Yeah, I'm really trying to learn to not be embarrassed that I love reality TV. So I feel like it has this negative, like people think if you like reality TV, then you like drama. But I don't like drama. I like to watch other people's drama, but not if, like, not if it's hurting them and not real people. I know in real life I'm not sitting there eating popcorn and watching people fight, but like. But on TV it's just like it's this thing that helps you to kind of zone out, and I've always like my whole life but I'm someone who is like the listener, the person who's always helping people, the soft you know shoulder to cry on, and so I think it's just like one of these things for me where it just helps me check out yeah, so yeah, definitely reality TV.
Rachel Mae:I love that. Well, we're reality TV fans around here.
Natalie Wilkinson:I watch.
Rachel Mae:I watch reality TV. Yeah, I love me some reality TV and I think, yeah, you're right, it's the like I like to yeah watch the drama of those shows and not have that drama playing out in my own life.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah.
Rachel Mae:It's like. It is just kind of like you can just sort of turn off those parts of your brain that want to try to solve or fix things, or it's a weird kind of like soothing. I feel like in so many of these conversations that something that comes up Maybe it's another part of that like collective experiences, mamas, that we are doing so much and we're doing all this deep work too. Right, like what we talked about in the first half of this conversation. We're talking about like regulating emotions and reprogramming our mind, inner child, and doing all of these things. It's like that's incredible and that's the work to do, but it's also very heavy work. So sometimes you need to just sort of like flip those switches off and let yourself just kind of have that guilty pleasure. So this is perfect, because that's. The next question on the list is what's your guilty pleasure? Tv show. So it could be reality or not, but what's your like? Go to guilty pleasure or not? So guilty pleasure TV show.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah, so recently, like the most recent one for me, but now I'm not watching it because it's in between seasons. But Vanderpump rules, do you watch that one? I have not watched it. Oh my gosh.
Rachel Mae:I feel like there were a million memes going around that I didn't understand, because I have not been. I have not watched it yet. So tell me, tell me more.
Natalie Wilkinson:Well, the reason I started watching it was because of one of my podcast guests. She likes to watch Bravo reality TV. So I was like what's your favorite? And she said Vanderpump rules. And I remember you know Lisa Vanderpump because she's she used to be on Real Housewives of Beverly.
Rachel Mae:Hills.
Natalie Wilkinson:I was like OK, I know the show, but it just never seemed like my thing. Yeah, so I didn't have anything to watch. So I started watching it and I got just so hooked on it, like it's just, if you like like those reality like Real Housewives or whatever, you'd probably like it. Yeah, but those memes came about because, like the long term characters on there, there was like this big cheating scandal. Yeah, so that one like really sucked me in and now that it's over I've been watching like I caught up on Yellowstone. I don't know if you've seen that one.
Rachel Mae:That yet either. That's that's come up quite a bit in my mom versations recently too. I feel like I need to check that out.
Natalie Wilkinson:You know it's interesting because, like I again, I've never been like super into like Westerns or anything like that, but it's really good. It's like a, if you like, like family dynamic dramas. Yeah, that one's a really good one. And then what's really cool is they then went on to make like prequels for it. Ok, so they go back to like 1883. They have a prequel, like leading up to like the history of that family, and then they have like 1923, I think, which I haven't watched yet, but it's really. They're really good, really good show.
Rachel Mae:Ok, yeah, nice, I need to put these on my list.
Natalie Wilkinson:Oh yeah.
Rachel Mae:OK, well, so this is always like the weird pivot from, like the deep and like emotional next question after guilty pleasure TV show. But what's something that you wish someone had told you about motherhood before becoming a mama?
Natalie Wilkinson:I would say you don't have to be a perfect mom to be a good mom.
Rachel Mae:Oh, amen yeah.
Natalie Wilkinson:I think we really get lost in this. What is a good mom? Yeah, and also like that's not the same thing every day. Like some days you're like a good enough mom yeah, some days you're a kick ass mom, and some days you're just mediocre. Like some days you're like you're OK, but it's like it's not the same thing every day. And going back to kind of like the watermelon popsicles and the summer activities and the cute family pictures, like those things don't make you a perfect mom. You know those things are a skill set that have nothing to do with motherhood. It's like it's like being good at hosting people in your home.
Natalie Wilkinson:Right, it's a skill. Some people are just skilled at that. Some of us are not good at that stuff. It has nothing to do with the quality of you that you possess as a mother. So I think would have been great to have been. I guess, role modeled Like this is what a good mom is, because you can do all those really family fancy things and not necessarily be a good mom. So what does it really mean to be a good mom and you don't have to be perfect to be a good mom.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, and perfect is such an illusion, right? Even the things we see online, like I feel like, especially as I entered motherhood, that was something I really had to like, undo in my mind of like, just because I'm seeing these things reflected on social media or wherever I'm seeing them, does not mean that that is the reality all the time. Like you're seeing a snapshot or a moment in time. What you see isn't always the full picture, and perfect is like such an illusion because even if you do achieve perfection in a moment, it's a moment, it's fleeting, like that's not reality and it doesn't exist. You don't have to be perfect to be a good or great mom.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, you can have moments that you're like wow, that felt, like it went really well and I'm proud of myself for moments where you're like OK, like today was hard and I'm still a good mom. Like maybe even those days are the ones that define us even more, the ones that are really gritty and hard and we feel like we come out and we're just frazzled and everything was like a challenge, but you survived the day, like sometimes those things are the real defining moments, I think, in our lives. So I like that, that's a good one. So Is there somebody like a go-to influencer or somebody that you are really inspired by? It could be like a blogger or a podcaster, or I really like Tabitha Brown.
Natalie Wilkinson:Her thing is I am Tabitha Brown. I think she really blew up when the pandemic started around that time. Then there's another lady I really like. It's Flora DeLise Speaks. She writes these really beautiful quotes. A lot of her pictures are like her writing. They're usually things that are encouraging or uplifting really nice reminders.
Natalie Wilkinson:I would say those two. Then I always like funny people. I don't know. There's this guy on Calvin Grimes. He'll go up to people in the grocery store and mess with them. He'll pretend that his blood sugar is low and get them to feed him grapes. It sounds silly but it's so funny. I always like funny things. I like to watch people cook, cook things that I'm never going to cook. Stuff like that, yeah. But those two ladies I really love just their encouragement and their wisdom. Those are really good accounts.
Rachel Mae:Awesome, I have to check them out. Is there a favorite product or resource that you think has made mom life easier?
Natalie Wilkinson:I would say definitely my group that I started just because there's so much that I don't know about being a mom and there's moms in there who are still caring for adult children, so kids that are in their 20s. It's really comforting to me to know that when Riley goes through puberty and when he's a teenager and all those things, I'll have moms I can go to and talk to that have been through it and will understand. There's some stuff about raising boys that it's a little awkward and it's going to become awkward and not going to understand how to navigate it, Knowing that there will be moms that I can be like hey, what the heck is this? Can you please help me? That's probably my biggest resource. That's helped me Great.
Rachel Mae:I love that this is something that you are fostering and creating and that the things that we do, that we put out in the world, that are serving others, and then internally, that come back and feed us in the same way. I love that. I love that you have generations of mommas in there who have all different stages. That is such a powerful thing to be able to support and draw upon each other's experience and help one another navigate things. Obviously, all of our experiences are going to be our own and they're going to be unique, but it's really really helpful to have somewhere where you can turn that feels like a safe space to be like hey, uncharted territory here, help me out. How cool that you've got that support, waiting in the wings when you need it and as you need it. It's really cool.
Natalie Wilkinson:That's why it kills me when moms argue with each other online, like when moms judge each other and put each other down, because it's like so many of us don't have mother figures to go to, so many of us don't have support, and it's like you should be looking at. I don't like to tell people what they should be doing, but I'm going to right now. You should be looking at other moms as, like your sisters, I may need you at some point, because we need each other.
Natalie Wilkinson:We need each other now and we're going to need each other in the future, because motherhood is such a unique, singular experience that nobody else understands except for other moms. So we have to be nicer to each other.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, so good. Okay, well, tell me what's something you're obsessed with.
Natalie Wilkinson:I mean kind of like some of the standard things like coffee. Coffee is always on my mind caffeine, iced coffee and I'm a very indecisive person, so like I spend my drives to the coffee place going back and forth Like what am I going to get? How caffeinated do I want to be? Do I want it iced? Do I want it blended? I almost never order hot coffee because here it's like it's hot more than half a year. It's hot a lot of the time.
Natalie Wilkinson:But yeah, I would say coffee is a big one for me. Yeah, I feel like that's like the central one.
Rachel Mae:Amazing. What's your dream vacation Like? If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Natalie Wilkinson:I like I've been fortunate enough to like get to travel to some different places, like my dad's from Italy, all his families in Italy have gotten to go to like Europe and Asia. So, like for me, my dream vacation is Hawaii. I feel like that's somewhere that, like, a lot of people have been, but like I would really like to see Hawaii. I don't know what area, because I know there's a lot of places you can go to, but yeah, that's for me, that's where I would put my money down on a vacation Awesome.
Rachel Mae:Okay, well, fill in the blank.
Natalie Wilkinson:I feel most like myself when I'm I feel most like myself when I'm at home. I would say, okay, yeah, I feel most like I can be me and not really have to worry about being embarrassed or anything like that.
Rachel Mae:I love it. So what is your current ambitious goal?
Natalie Wilkinson:My current ambitious goal, I would say, is to like start a new career.
Natalie Wilkinson:Like retirement age is still way, way far away. So I feel like that'd be really great to like have some kind of career, invest in my family financially. There is part of my brain that's like are you too old? And that's so silly, because if someone my age asked me, are you, am I too old? I'd be like what are you talking about? Not old, what are you talking about? Your brain's alive and going, probably too much, and so you're going to be fine. So, yeah, that's, that's probably my thing. So I'd like to find something to do.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, It'll be interesting to watch and see how that unfolds for you. You have to keep us posted. Yeah, okay. So, guys, what are you known for?
Natalie Wilkinson:I would say I'm probably like somewhat known for, you know, running the group that I run. I feel like a lot of times people reference me that way, like link me to that.
Rachel Mae:Is that a bizarre experience for you, like I know this group feeds your soul and that you love that, but I know this is also like you didn't anticipate that this was going to be a path that you would go down. Has that been like a bizarre experience for you to be so intertwined and linked to something that has become as big as it has? That you didn't anticipate?
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah, it is kind of weird sometimes, like I'll get on Facebook and find that I'm tagged somewhere, like oh you should join Natalie's group. What I do love, though, is that the moms in the group are so supportive that I don't feel like I'm expected to have all the answers.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah, because I don't I really don't and because everyone's journey with something like having an autistic kid is so different Like the things that you do, the systems that you interact with, the different like in the school system, different things you have to do for your kid are so different that there's so many answers I don't have.
Natalie Wilkinson:But the moms in the group, somebody will have it and so I really love that because I feel like I get to be what I'm good at, which is I am a good connection, like I'm a good bridge. I like to be the person that helps someone get the answers or the help they need. So like, if you're in a place where you feel stuck, confused, alone, I will totally hold your hand and help you get to the person who is going to help you figure this out. Like I like to be that person and I will not let you go until you're good, and then I don't have to have all the answers, like I don't have to know all the things. So yeah, it is kind of weird, but I also appreciate that I don't have to be everything for everybody, because I don't have the capacity, unfortunately. I mean nobody does.
Rachel Mae:So what's something most folks don't know about you?
Natalie Wilkinson:I am an incredibly stubborn person. Incredibly stubborn I had to develop like as a kid, because I grew up in a pretty, like, chaotic household. I had to develop this sense of calm. I had to be everybody's sense of calm, and so what that looks like on the outside is just this very calm person who's not bothered, who can handle a crisis and I can. I can handle other people's crisis. My own it's harder. I have a lot of anxiety. I have a lot of fear around things that I'm emotionally connected to myself, my son, my husband, things that are outside of my control. But it doesn't look like that on the outside. So I just look very calm and so people see that, but what's really underneath, too, is just this incredibly stubborn, feisty, like I really had to learn how to be quiet and polite and seen and not heard as a kid. But I am so stubborn Like so many of the things that I've accomplished in my life are because you can't tell me I can't do something. You know what I mean.
Rachel Mae:That watch me. Energy is powerful. Oh yeah, oh yeah.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah, I mean the best. Actually, if you want to get me to do something, tell me that I can't. And I'm going to do it just to, not just to show you, but just to, like, make it clear, like, yes, I can. And most people just don't see that because it's not really, it's not an external thing for me. It's very much like, like you know, it's like you're opening a pickle jar. My husband will be standing there. I'm struggling. Do you need help? No, I don't need help. I'm trying to learn how to accept the help, but I don't want you to help me. I want to, you know, break my fingers to get this thing open. So, yeah, I have. I have a really huge stubborn streak.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, I can relate to that.
Natalie Wilkinson:It's just this like not wanting to admit that you need anybody's help with stuff.
Rachel Mae:Well, like if you're saying like this kind of goes back to that inner child stuff that we touched on a little bit earlier that if you're talking about when your experience as a child is that you need to be like the calm, capable, handle everything person, it's really asking for help, is kind of rocking the boat, or like if there's already a chaotic situation and you're going to ask for help, there's a chance that you may be contributing to the chaos or asking or adding pressure. So there's some through lines there of where we carry those things into our adulthood. Yeah, okay, so fill in the blank. I do blank, so my kids blank.
Natalie Wilkinson:I would say I go to therapy so that my child can have a healthy mom.
Rachel Mae:Yeah, yeah, that's powerful and that's like kind of full circle. You've talked a lot about these different touch points of our own motherhood experience and how we're doing the work on ourselves so that the work looks different for our children, cause, like right, they're still going to have their own work to do because they're humans, they're having a human experience, but the work is going to look different for them because of what we're choosing to do.
Natalie Wilkinson:I hope so. Yeah, I really hope so.
Rachel Mae:Okay, so this next one. I think I kind of know the answer, based on your obsession. But what fills your cup, both literally and figuratively?
Natalie Wilkinson:So I think, like, as an introvert, time alone definitely fills my cup. I definitely have to have time by myself. If you think about like love languages, words of affirmation are huge for me. So I have this thing I don't know why, where like I will forget how people feel about me if I don't hear about it once in a while. So the words of affirmation are like important because I don't make assumptions about like how people feel about me or like how I impact people. So, like I do like super appreciate hearing and I make a point to always tell people like what I see in them, what I appreciate about them, I think because that's so impactful for me on the other side, of it so.
Natalie Wilkinson:I would say yeah.
Rachel Mae:That's very true, even as you were saying that I was just thinking about, like some of the exchanges that you and I like, this is the first time we're seeing each other face to face, but we've had many exchanges on Instagram and I was just thinking, as you were saying that, of some of the really super kind and generous things that you've said via DM or in comments on Instagram, like you definitely embody that.
Natalie Wilkinson:So I see that in you.
Rachel Mae:Yeah.
Natalie Wilkinson:Yeah, I feel like we don't get a lot of time here and we don't often stop and tell people like this is why I think you're special, and it's uncomfortable sometimes to tell people like, hey, I just think all these great things about you and this is what they are, sometimes, like people don't we're not all the same at receiving, like it's hard to receive. Sometimes you're like what that challenges every like take the place in my head about who I am and what my value is, and I'm not. I don't want to sound morbid, but like when I'm not here anymore, you know I want to have left behind things like that. I want people to know, like how I felt about them, what I saw in them, what I thought was special. So I do try to like make it a point to say those things out loud. I love that.
Rachel Mae:And I don't think it's morbid at all. I think we never know either when the chance is going to be taken away. So, it's like speak now what needs to be said, because you don't know that you will get the chance to say it another day. So I think that's.
Rachel Mae:I think it's powerful and important to remember. So, yeah, oh, my gosh. Well, this has been so much fun. I will link to everything that we talked about and mentioned in our conversation in the show description so everybody can easily find it and connect with you. But I just want to say again how grateful I am that you signed up to come and hang out with me here, because it really it's one thing to connect on social platforms, it's another thing to like have a more in-depth conversation, and I just love, as podcasters, that we get to share this conversation now with the other mamas in the community, and it's been really, really fun and I'm so happy that social media crossed our paths in this way.
Natalie Wilkinson:I really enjoyed getting to chat with you too, and actually the only reason I signed up because I wanted to like hang out with you. I don't really do podcasts, so I was like I just want to kind of like hang out with Rachel for a little bit, because I really enjoyed getting to know you online. But yeah, thank you so much for having me on.
Rachel Mae:That's it for today's episode, but if you're loving this series and you want to join me for a conversation, follow the link in the show description to submit the guest form and let's chat, and if you want to continue the conversation with me over on Instagram, I'd love to connect with you there. You can find me at Mama's Cup of Ambition. I want to extend a special thanks to today's guests for bringing the energy and the good vibes to this podcast party, and a great, big, heartfelt thanks to you as well. This show exists because you tune in, and I really can't tell you how much your support means to me. And, last but not least, if you got something out of today's episode, it would mean so much to me if you would take a moment to leave the show a rating and review.
Rachel Mae:Or, if reviews aren't really your thing, consider sharing the show with a friend who you think might take value from it. Those are both great ways to support the podcast and keep it going and growing. Plus, it just seriously fills my cup. So thank you. Okay, so until next time, make your dreams be ambitious, and may your coffee be strong. I'll talk to you soon.